Virtual reality

I walk, I run into this world of new and unknown faces, young and old, graceful and loving, still and moving. I walk through the galaxy of unending faces and places.  I wait, when will I  next see your face again. When I’ll see your face, face to face. All there is, is virtual reality. The thought of you has become reality. I lean on to see you walk towards me, I sit by my window to see you walk out of your front door. There you are my happy thought which will last till I make it reality or kill it. The dilemma of letting you be real or kill you or live on in this virtual reality. Is there a way out? Is there a way I can turn this into reality, where I can touch you and feel you. Will this never end? Is this forever to last? How long do you think I can hang on to you, virtual reality? This seems eternal, with no beginning and no end. I woke up one morning and found myself in the center of your world. Now its become mine. It flows through my veins, through my heart every second of being mortal. You’ll be part of me even when I fly high in the sky free as a bird. I know you will not be gone sooner, you will last my whole life. Your world is beautiful and never turns me off, it blows life into me, it carries me with the wind, into the ocean, above the waves and into the sky. You’ll never forgot me. Neither will I. I wonder if I left your world, would I still live in beauty and love? Will I ever forget your face if I wanted to? This seems impossible at this point. You are my virtual reality. You’ll always be my happy thought? Or will I ever see you? I feel you fading away slowly and gradually. Is this going to end soon? I feel the absence, and I don’t feel pain. I feel happiness and I feel you. I don’t know if this is it. I fear nothing anymore, I have this strength inside of me. Your world has something to do with it. With strength, you are my weakness sometimes, you can break me just by snapping your finger. But somehow you give me strength which can’t break me so easily. That part is me. Still I think till when will this last? This remains my pursuit, to know what happens to you and what happens to me. I silently wait, living in your happy thought, in your world which has become mine too. Virtual reality!

Till death do us part..

When you were born you were crying and everyone else was smiling. Live your life so at the end, you’re the one who is smiling and everyone else is crying.”

This is what the great poet Ralph Waldo Emerson had to say about making your life so worthwhile that your death causes the world to go blue. The best example we can see today is Dr. APJ Abdul Kalam. The whole world mourned while this bird flew in freedom.  When life exhausted, evaporated into the air, the name left, and what remained was merely “his body”.

This brings me to understand the value of life. The value of the air we breathe in, that we don’t pay attention to. Every second of our life we are living and not dying. The value of life over death. Our heart beats every now and then; because if it stops, you and me, we stop! Stop forever. The essence of life has so much meaning than just doing our daily chores, working, being lazy, gossiping or doing nothing. Have you ever stopped for a while, not for a second but for a while in your busy schedule or a lazy one to realize that you are breathing in life into yourself ever second. Knowing that your life is not a sentence that will end in judgement and death but it is a statement of endless sphere of possibilities and happiness if you want it to be, which leads to a reward instead.

That’s why it is said live such that people cry when you are dead. But this isn’t possible unless we ourselves understand the value of the life which is given to us by God.

That’s what a person needs to do who wants to die famous!! 😀

There is another saying..

“People mourn over the dead but don’t value them when they were alive.”

Your funeral will be more crowded than any other function you would have hosted. People who never talked to you when you were alive, who never bothered about you or who ignored your call every time you called them will be there. This is a fact!

One side Ralph is saying live such that people will cry when  you die and the other side I’m saying people mourn over the dead but don’t value them when they were alive. Here, I don’t mean to say that all the mourners don’t value the dead but there many for whom the life of that person never mattered. And I feel that they have no business coming to the funeral. Funeral is not organised for heartless people to show their faces after the person is dead.  But I do believe in forgiving my transgressors.

So, my point being, work towards being a person whom people will never forget after you die, learn to value your life AND also work to become a person who understands the value of another person’s life, be it anybody. A beggar or a rock star, how ever dirty, bad or good, everyone has a life which has value and has meaning, a lot more than just these four letters L-I-F-E.

ALL YOU’LL KNOW IS WHAT I WANT

I’m a hard nut to crack,

You’re the water that flows over me,

But I’m the stone, that only molds

You can never flow through me.

I’m the statue in the museum you see

The white Greek goddess right there,

Your eyes peel off my whiteness

My bare wounds are seen.

You don’t know what I’m made of

The core of the earth, you can’t see,

That’s me, the blue and green

This is all you see.

Dig as much you need,

All you’ll know is what I want,

Rubies, diamonds you may find

But that’s not all, there’s more inside

I’m a daisy white as ever

Delicate as a baby bird,

But when winds blow

I become a tree rooted in the depths of the sea.

I’m a lioness

I’ll kill to survive,

You’ll never know that

Because your heart’s in my hand.

The Fruit Is Yet To be Ripened

There’s a theory, that children have pure souls, unlike you and me who are older now and have messed it up somewhere or the other. A child if reared in a surrounding where there are no negative stimuli, enforces no change in its behavior, the child will grow naturally the way it is without any impurities but with a true and clean soul. The child would be an ideal person in today’s time. Even psychology has a say in this. And to some extent many would agree with me. There are many factors to it though- that if a child is not exposed to various stimuli how will it learn and grow, build up his mind. All that is true. But this is just a theory. Let’s go to the next level. Take an example, I as a child was very sincere, did all my work on time, faithful in delivering any deadline without fail and the list goes on. Now imagine, or just read on. I am surrounded with people who really don’t care about deadlines, responsibilities, being faithful, etc. For whom responsibility is just another crushed paper down into the dustbin. “Hey, I told you to ask that guy if he would work for me.” “Oh yeah! Sorry I forgot. I’ll ask him today.” Why do you we forget? Is it really forgetfulness or you don’t want to do that job. Sometimes you really don’t want to do the job. But many times, I must say in most of the cases, it’s merely forgetfulness. That’s when I wonder- Do we have such small brains that it can’t accommodate a small thing such as a statement which I just told him! NO we don’t. We have a sufficiently huge brain to store a large amount of data. We can actually store 100 TB of data in our brain!! The problem is we forget to store it! That’s just it. WE human beings forget to store those tiny sentences. Another problem is WE have a huge brain! And forgetting to store this tiny little sentence, just gives it a free ride to go anywhere to settle down, with we knowing nothing about where it went!

Coming back to my point of being faithful and remembering important tit bits. So how does it connect to the child being nurtured in a surrounding with no negative stimuli? The child, when he observes people around him who actually don’t care about commitments made, responsibilities given, starts to think -Why should I be so faithful and responsible when the people around actually don’t care and take it lightly! Then there are kids who don’t ask that question and go on with their lives being responsible and faithful. There are the strong, tall trees in the midst of clumsy and droopy ones. For those who do ask this question end up adding number to the clumsy and droopy trees. For them, there comes a time in their life when somewhere they will have to relearn all those things they unlearned in the process of growing up. Many of us get to this part in life sooner or later. But still I can’t digest the fact that how can people be comfortable with this attitude. And it’s a prominent feature everyone gets to see when they end their school life and start a new life called college. Well, all of us are still yet to be ripened. We are a fruit, and we are growing. Age doesn’t matter, what matters is how ripe you are, up there in the top floor!

A Scary Dream

I opened the front door and I saw lions walking around in the street. Not running around, but casually walking around as if they lived there. The street was empty with no soul to be seen, not even vehicles. Just one lion walking calmly looking around. The foot path was spot clean with grass evenly growing in the open space beyond it. Everything was at right angles, the road, the footpath, the grassed area, and the houses. The houses didn’t have a boundary wall, just a small veranda that opened on to the street. I went inside and shut the door. Fear didn’t seem to overtake me at this moment. I went back to do my work. Suddenly I heard a shriek. I ran out to see. The lion had done something, hurt a person or hurt itself. I brought it in. He walked in and sat in the living room in one corner with his head held up. He didn’t seem to be fearful and neither was I. I looked at him for a while and then turned around to get back to work. And I hadn’t realised that I had another animal in my house, my dog! He ran into the living room barking playfully or with anger and straight ran to the lion sitting there. And the lion sprang up and caught hold of my dog’s neck. They quarrelled little bit first. Now my dog was still with his neck clutched in the lion’s teeth. It happened so fast, I couldn’t even stop my dog. I didn’t know what to do. I stood there staring at them. And then suddenly like lighting it struck me I have to save my dog. I ran towards them, held the lion’s jaw. With all my strength I pulled it apart. My dog fell on the ground. I called out in anger, “Susan! help me.” She came running from inside and she also held the lion’s jaws and together we pulled it apart. At this point I wanted to kill it. That was the only thought running through my mind. With the anger of seeing my dog wounded, almost dead I just wanted to kill it. I broke its jaw. And next thing I ripped him up into two pieces from his head to tail. Every single bone in this body, his spine I had broken it with my bare hands.  There he lay dead on my living room floor. I was so saddened looking at my dog. I couldn’t see him like this. I loved him so much. His cute, innocent, dreamy eyed face pictured in my head. I ran to him to check him. He walked a little and then he fell flat all of a sudden. He was not dead completely. I inspected his neck. There was no blood flowing out but marks of the lion’s teeth were there like it had made holes in his neck with blood being seen but nothing flowed out. I had to take him to the hospital. Me, my mom and Susan, my sister were discussing and came to a conclusion that we would ask our neighbour if he could take my dog to the doctor in his car. So I went out, he was coming down the stairs. Hesitantly I asked him if he could help in taking my dog to the doctor because there was no other way we could get him there fast. This neighbour didn’t like us much so I wasn’t sure if he would help. But he said yes. I carried my dog out and to his car. He had a Ferrari, red in colour. Only two people could fit in it. The doors opened upwards. It was such that if I sat in I couldn’t see the driver and neither could he see me. There was a covered space that separated the two seats. Maybe it housed the engine. Even the space where one had to sit was really small. I had to stuff in to fit. But there was my dog too. So I put him in and there was no space left now for me, I closed the door. My dog was sad and he didn’t even cry out of pain. I was standing beside the car, when I saw a man walking down the street. I shouted, “go inside your house, there’s a lion walking behind you.” And I turned around and sat on top of the car on my dog’s side keeping support and we drove off. There was something going on in the city. I had felt it before we had started. Unlike our street it was so noisy, so many people all around the place, shops were filled with people buying stuff. People were not their normal self. The sky was dull and not blue. It left devilish, like something evil was going on. We reached the place. It was a huge complex. There were lot of people here also. It was like a huge Greek structure. It had huge pillars separating large halls but without a ceiling. It was gloomy in there. I had to go to the doctors’ section. One hall had many circular tables with people sitting around it and eating, like in a restaurant. Another hall there were more people all around. I walked and stood in a queue. It was not one but four queues filled with people waiting to go in. We were standing  beside the hall with the circular tables. In the other hall something had happened and a man took out his gun and pointed it to a woman’s head. He held her and brought her to the circular tables’ hall and said he would kill her and suddenly everybody started dancing. There was loud music and everyone started shouting and dancing. Even that man and woman. I stood in my line there waiting for my turn. My dog was dying and there was no sign of the queue ending. People were shouting now standing for so long. I was fearful. I didn’t want my dog to die. I couldn’t handle it if that happened. I wanted him back the way he was, I couldn’t let him go like this. I was so impatient. I didn’t know what to do. There was no way I could see that would condense the line of people in front of me. Then I spotted a man in the front. I knew that man. I could ask him for a favour and he could let me in before the others. I went to him and told him about my situation. Instead of helping me, he pushed me further back in the line. I was furious and at the same time anxious. I wanted to do something but I wasn’t able to do and there was no way that I could go in. People were going mad, worse than before. I was getting the feeling that I was in a temple. Some strange temple where there was something evil everywhere I looked. The air inside was stuffy. The sky was dull than ever. It was like everything was blackening slowly.  There were roots hanging from the beams that connected the tall pillars. I was burning inside. A man went in from the queue. Everyone was dancing as if they were possessed. And he went in dancing like this. Suddenly a few people in this madness threw him into the water. It was a water channel with walls on both sides and water currents strongly flowing, so much so as huge waves were formed because of that. The walls had pillars that extended till the ceiling which were dark like the other pillars. This water channel flowed through this complex.  I couldn’t trace the origin of its source. It came from nowhere. This water channel had a slanted ceiling unlike the other areas, covered in black. And as he flowed with the water, it threw him here and there, I could see him laughing and enjoying it. As the water threw him, his head hit one of the pillars and everything froze for a moment and the next second the man was nowhere to be seen. Only his blood covered a part of the pillar, flowing down into the water. In no time the strong currents washed of the pillar and it looked like nothing had ever happened.

And my eyes opened. I was lying straight on my back. I felt paralysed all throughout my body with my arms and legs stiffly straight. Slowly I regained consciousness. I got up and went to the front door to see outside. And what I saw was unreal! There was a lion walking down the street. No one was outside. I ran back inside to check on my dog. He was lying on the floor half dead in the back room and my balcony door was open. I ran to him and saw teeth marks on his neck but he didn’t bleed. I sat on the floor as tears rolled down my eyes and looked at my dog breathing with pain.

Metamorphosis

A big head but a small body, fluent in his thoughts and straight forward in his attitude. A lookalike of Jacky Chan, the famous movie star. Fine hair faintly highlighting his eyebrows. His voice gentle but firm, with the sweetness of a manly touch. Sings like a bird sitting on the tallest tree letting the breeze embrace its solitude. Arms and legs with the might of a wrestler. From the plains to the mountains this story begins. Of a man who wants to be himself and only him. The quietness of this humble human, the silence but only an invisible cat walking around him, meowing occasionally; making his presence sensed by the folk neighboring him. His crippled body and an injured heart, all it needed was some support and a balm to cure. As he climbed the lofty highs, with time and space changing its state; his heart seemed to bloom like a rose awakening from a thousand years’ snore. And his voice spoke with grace of the lost and found. From the noises came through a music of the soul.The long lost rhythm of breath took its natural course.  The journey of the lost and found had begun. Opening his treasury to humans around him, flushing out ideas a lay man would have about life and its doings. Understanding of the sentence lived in despair and vacuum turning into a mountain covered with lush green. Metamorphosis of an old snail shoved into its shell from a caterpillar to becoming a butterfly. The definition of beauty unleashed in the most subtle way, defining every part of it meticulously. With the energy of a leopard and the appearance of a deer; with the soul of the mortal and the heart of flesh, from a flicker of hope to the flame that could burn down; in the direction of something anew in the ancient trail of life. What comes beyond is the newness kept fresh with the old left to die. Towards the end when life turns to dust, it’s the clock ticking backwards and the turning of a dried plant into flowers. This is the story of a man finding himself in his story of life.

Things you want to cling on to!

Its been a long time, being associated to something beyond I know, something beyond just my family and friends. Something that gives me that belongingness, that love and that it’s mine as well. With I being myself, and nothing more. Knowing people , simple lovely people, with beautiful hearts. After long I actually feel I’m going to miss something. I’ll cherish this time for a lifetime. It maybe just a seed, but this seed is going to sprout into a fruitful tree someday. And that’s what gives it the value it has.
Life is such, with unexpected turns and twists, absence and presence of various aspects, love and hate of people, of goodness and badness , of the things you learn, of the things you take as a flower and not a thorn, slide down the bumpy road knowing there’s always water you’ll splash into. Seeing the world as roller coaster, with me screaming out with excitement due to the swiftness of what’s going on.
Being a part of something plainly, simply beautiful.

Rock your boat!

How to tame the raging sea? How to sail in a boat that keeps rocking due to the raging sea? Its fun sailing in such a boat, with the fear of falling into the sea any minute and also learning to balance it ever now and then. imagine living in a boat all your life, with abundance of food and water which comes from nowhere. You all alone rocking in the sea, enjoying it. Sleeping instead of thinking of drowning. In the mean time once in a while jumping into the sea, learning how to swim and yeah jump back into the boat when you see a shark approaching. Making a spear out of nothing and learning to kill fish and cook them for dinner; burn fire wood to keep you from the cold at night and make a small shelter to keep you from burning into ashes in the day. And forgetting about the rocking boat. Is it even rocking? I was too busy taking care of myself and learning to make stuff that I forgot that the boat was even rocking and the sea was roaring. And then when you start rocking the boat, that’s when you actually start living, that’s when the boat is yours and the sea is yours. That’s when you tame the raging sea.

Make out of it What you want!

The splash of colour like a bucket full of water thrown onto a car being washed turns into a auto with one wheel  and its steering wheel lying on the ground. Another splash of colour on the auto and it miraculously turns into a bike with another wheel and the wind shield on the ground. That’s when I fill the empty bucket with colour from my poster colour bottles and splash once again. It turns into a unicycle with one wheel and its handle on the ground. How would it be if this was possible? And then to get back your previous vehicles just wash off the colour. That’s how you get four in one!

Calamity

Like the one in Nepal, that’s huge! With everything above you rushing down with the speed of light and you’re dead! What could be worse? Life! Death is the easy way out. Not that life is bad and useless. Now what doesn’t have it’s pros and cons. Calamities happen everywhere, it’s just that we see the ones that make the head lines. In our heads, our hearts, everywhere there are calamities happening, everyday. Behind closed doors, out there in the open, which we all close our eyes to and pretend the world is a flower bed with honey bees jumping from one flower to another. Deep down the earth is shifting slowly, everything seems beautiful and sweet on the top for now. Will the Air force come to save us from these calamities? Or will the government? Who will save us?  Aren’t we all busy and preoccupied with saving ourselves that we don’t see what’s happening around? While I am thinking about how should I save myself from one calamity, there’s another person sitting there who doesn’t know what his calamity is all about! It’s like a volcano , the lava building up inside, the enormous amount of heat coming up to burst out into the sky. Into the peaceful expanse of what we call our world. The eruption causing earthquake and tonnes of smoke and lava flowing out, people running here and there, grabbing nothing but themselves and their loved ones. Running as far as possible. Why do they need to run? Can’t they figure out a way to overcome the effects of it? In human life they can. With the technology and the God given brain, what is impossible for man today? Nothing! The ones in our head and heart are like these great and mighty calamities which don’t need an earthquake to kill someone. We die a slow death unless we are saved from that calamity. We aren’t on the tomorrow’s front page to be seen and read by all. We are in ourselves, seeking! Seeking for the One thing that can save us all.